Beyond Memory Loss: Ellinwood Provider Shares Personal, Professional Perspective on Alzheimer’s Disease
Meredith Joiner, APRN, encourages early conversations, compassion and support for families navigating dementia.
ELLINWOOD, Kan. — For Meredith Joiner, APRN, at Ellinwood Hospital & Clinic, Alzheimer’s disease is more than a diagnosis she encounters in her medical practice. It is a disease that has profoundly affected her own family.
Joiner has lost two grandparents to Alzheimer’s, and just over a month ago, she lost an aunt to the disease as well. Those experiences have given her a deeply personal understanding of the challenges patients and families face, from the earliest signs of memory loss to the emotional and physical demands of caregiving.
“My first-hand experience with numerous family members affected by Alzheimer's disease has shown me the importance of being patient, being kind and understanding, and being a support to those affected by this disease,” Joiner said.
It has also reinforced a message she hopes more people will hear: Memory concerns should never be a source of shame, and no one should feel they have to face an Alzheimer’s diagnosis alone.
Recognizing the Signs
Alzheimer’s disease is the most common form of dementia, a group of conditions that affect memory, thinking, behavior and the ability to perform everyday activities.
While occasional forgetfulness can be a normal part of aging, Joiner said there are important differences between typical age-related memory changes and the progressive decline associated with Alzheimer’s.
Forgetting where you placed your glasses or taking longer to recall information may be normal. However, repeatedly asking the same questions, forgetting conversations or struggling with familiar tasks can signal something more serious.
“It's especially important to pay attention to the small things,” Joiner said.
Other warning signs may include difficulty managing finances, paying bills, maintaining a household or performing routine activities that once required little thought. Changes in language, judgment and behavior may also occur.
Not all dementia is Alzheimer’s. Other conditions, including vascular dementia, Lewy body dementia and frontotemporal dementia, can affect patients differently. Identifying the underlying cause is an important part of determining the appropriate care.
Joiner encourages anyone who notices persistent changes in their own memory or that of a loved one to speak with a healthcare provider rather than dismissing those concerns as an inevitable part of aging.
Evaluations may include cognitive assessments, such as the Montreal Cognitive Assessment (MoCA), and brain imaging when appropriate.
Joiner said patients are sometimes anxious about cognitive testing, fearing they might fail.
“This test is not a pass or fail,” she said. “Instead, it helps establish a baseline, identify potential concerns and guide further evaluation.”
Addressing symptoms early allows patients and families to explore treatment options, identify other conditions that may be contributing to memory problems and begin planning for the future.
Breaking the Stigma
One of the most difficult challenges Joiner sees is the tendency for individuals to hide their memory struggles out of embarrassment or fear.
“The most common, and disheartening part of dementia, or Alzheimer's, is wanting to keep it a secret,” she said.
But Joiner believes acknowledging those challenges can be empowering.
She encourages patients to be comfortable telling others, “My memory is challenging,” or “I'm having a hard time remembering things.”
Being open allows friends and family to better understand what someone is experiencing. Rather than questioning repeated stories or forgotten appointments, they can offer reminders, patience and practical support.
“The honest truth is that when you are open and upfront, you may find you have more support than you have living with this alone,” Joiner said.
She frequently reminds patients and families that Alzheimer's is a medical condition, not a personal failing.
“If you had diabetes, we'd treat you for this and we'd all be a lot more forgiving of this because it's diabetes,” Joiner said. “Alzheimer's or dementia is no different.”
Caring for the Caregiver
While Alzheimer’s directly affects the person diagnosed, Joiner knows firsthand that its impact extends throughout the family.
“The most profound lesson I have witnessed, both personally and professionally, is the strain on the caregiver or caregivers,” she said.
The progression of the disease can place tremendous demands on spouses, children and other family members who assume caregiving responsibilities. Feelings of frustration, exhaustion, isolation and guilt are common.
“The personal journey is very lonely. It consumes a great deal of the caregiver's time and energy,” Joiner said. “Patience becomes a virtue that can be hard to dig deep to find.”
She encourages families to build a support system early, allowing primary caregivers opportunities for rest, personal time and assistance with daily responsibilities.
Just as importantly, she urges caregivers to extend compassion to themselves.
“Give grace to yourself and to your loved one,” Joiner said.
That compassion also means recognizing when a loved one’s care needs may exceed what can safely be provided at home.
Joiner encourages families to have conversations early about legal arrangements, future care preferences and the possibility of additional assistance or residential care.
“If and when the time comes that you are no longer able to keep your loved one at home, know that you are not a failure,” she said. “You have not failed your loved one.”
For families navigating those difficult decisions, professional guidance can be invaluable.
Ellinwood Hospital & Clinic works with Michelle Niedens, Director of the KU Alzheimer's Disease Center's Cognitive Care Network is a social worker with more than 40 years of experience in memory care. Niedens provides counseling, practical coping strategies, guidance for families and connections to additional resources, including providers familiar with emerging treatments and therapies.
Supporting Brain Health and Finding Hope
Although there is currently no cure for Alzheimer’s disease, Joiner emphasizes that there are steps people can take to support their cognitive health and address certain risk factors.
Regular physical activity, mental stimulation, social engagement and a healthy diet all play important roles in overall brain health.
Managing conditions such as high blood pressure and high cholesterol is also important, as is addressing hearing or vision loss and untreated sleep apnea. Excessive alcohol use and social isolation can also contribute to cognitive health concerns.
For those already experiencing memory changes, Joiner stresses that withdrawing from friends, family and community activities can make an already difficult situation worse.
“We cannot crawl in a hole and hide,” she said.
While treatments cannot reverse Alzheimer’s, certain medications may help manage symptoms or slow disease progression in eligible patients. Medical research also continues to create opportunities for improved diagnosis and treatment.
Joiner compares that progress to advances made in cancer care, where research and the participation of patients have helped improve treatment options for future generations.
“We cannot lose hope in the treatment of this disease,” she said.
For Joiner, that hope extends beyond medical advancements. It is found in families who seek answers early, communities that support their neighbors and caregivers who recognize that asking for help is an act of love rather than weakness.
Her advice to those who have noticed changes in their own memory is simple: Talk to your primary care provider. Don't hide your concerns, and don't allow fear or embarrassment to prevent you from seeking support.
For families caring for someone with Alzheimer’s, she offers an equally important reminder.
“Remember, you can only take care of others when you take care of yourself.”
Above all, Joiner wants people facing Alzheimer’s or another form of dementia to know they are not alone.
Individuals concerned about memory changes or seeking guidance for a loved one can contact Ellinwood Hospital & Clinic at 620-564-3771 to schedule an appointment with a healthcare provider.
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